This is a story about a person named Somebody.
Somebody had a condition. Somebody did not know the name of the condition, let alone, awareness of having the condition. One day, Somebody was daydreaming out of the window of class while a story was being told. The story was about a relationship, or what Somebody thought the story was about. Somebody was too distracted. Distracted by the number of thoughts running through Somebody’s head and the constant moving of what was happening outside. One phrase snapped Somebody out of the trance and felt the words dig deep into the soul.
“Never EVER explain. A friend will not need it, and an enemy won’t believe you”
Several years went by and Somebody constantly quoted that phrase during any conversations with others. One day, Somebody’s significant other said “Baby. Why are you always explaining yourself!” Those words hit Somebody hard. Felt like it ripped the soul from the body. Somebody was hurt because Somebody was guilty of doing the same thing that was being told not to do to others.
Because of Someboy’s awareness of explaining, Somebody focused hard and intentionally worked on fighting the urge to explain. Somebody’s awareness allowed the opportunity to fix the problem, not knowing that it would inevitably lead to self-destruction.
Being aware of the constant explaining, Somebody realized how often somebody does it. In doing so, it brought heavy frustration. So heavy that Somebody started to dissection and understand why Somebody constantly explained. Somebody constantly explained because every time somebody conversed, the words would become misinterpreted. The misinterpretation led to a constant need to explain what was really meant.
How can somebody work on not explaining when, in simply talking, words are heard from a different perspective and point of view? Slowly Somebody sunk into a dark depression. Somebody’s entire life felt like it crumbled right from underneath. Somebody was always a people person. Somebody was always fun to be around and was always the life of the party. Somebody loved talking and could mingle with anybody. Talking was Somebody’s life and without it, slowly there were fewer laughs. There were fewer conversations. The less conversations, the fewer questions, and with fewer questions, less asking for help.
Words being misinterpreted was a gamble that was not worth the stress and frustration that added to the feeling of being alone, not being seen, and not being heard, which then added validation to the feeling of worthlessness. Constantly replaying times of being accused of things that Somebody never even thought about doing, all because nobody would believe the words. Replaying the jokes that weren’t funny because the words were misinterpreted. The compliments were responded to aggressively because the body language said something that was far from the truth.
Somebody couldn’t take it anymore. Couldn’t handle the feeling of not belonging. To not being heard and seen. To not be understood. To not be trusted by a loved one. Somebody couldn’t take that the phrase, “Never EVER explain. A friend will not need it, and an enemy won’t believe you” could heal so many! The phrase that pushed so many out of situations that would kill them. The phrase that led others to a positive direction in life. Somebody couldn’t handle the fact that the quote sucked the soul right out of Somebody’s body so many years prior because of the amount of truth in the quote.
Couldn’t handle the fact that an explanation is all that was needed to save Somebody’s life.